Part 1

The day was cold. Drat. He hated cold days because the TV in his house stopped working; unless, he put a towel over it, to warm it up. He didn't have a towel big enough to but over his whole house... and anyway all his towels were being used to stop the rats from chasing his cat. And the cat wasn't really a cat, mealy the potential for where a cat could be, which annoyed him even more. However i digress.

"What?! get off my loarn, i just made it sermetrical!"
"But sir, you said..."
"Shut up" he said, more to himself than the boy, his voice abbed, "why don't you just...." he peired at the boy, "your my son arn't you?" he asked politly.
"No sir."
"Good, being thirty five he should be taller than that."
"Are you drunk?" He paused to think about the boy's question. If the answer was yes... it would explain a lot, especaily the empty beer bottles in his house and the dead man in the garden.
"I say..." he said, trying to look kinder, "would you mind helping me call the police, you see there's a dead body round the back and i can't fine the phone under all the empty beer bottles."
The boy looked confused. He opened his mouth to speak.
"What...again?"